20 January, 2009

what I love

I don't know when I decided I wanted to be a mom. Maybe I was 5. I was always, always, taking care of someone. My younger brother, sister, the neighbor's kids, our BP's children (who are now grown and have served missions and graduated college), children of friend's (who are married). I just really enjoyed taking care of little ones. Big ones not so much (jk). But being a mom is much different. I was pretty well prepared, but still, a lot different.
Like the exhaustion of being a new mom (x6). No one explains that. How could they? You wouldn't believe them if they tried. Waking up after just falling asleep and sitting with this tiny baby for hours sometimes, until they figure out that it's time to sleep when it's dark outside.
How about the pain of nursing. Ouch. Especially with my first one. I was in tears.
What are you supposed to do when he has a blowout? And we're not talking tires here. It's up his back, in his hair, on my dress, in Sacrament meeting. Fun. Was I supposed to pack a change of clothes for both of us?
And then there's the problem of nursing when you're not at home. Shutting myself in someone else's bedroom to feed my baby while I miss the adult conversations (not ADULT, just grown up). You don't get too much of that as a mommy. I finally discovered (with #6) that the kind ladies who work @ the dressing rooms in the stores will gladly let you bring yourself (cart too) in and feed your baby, you can sit down, change him, let the other kids in tow rest too. Such sweet ladies. Thank you.
So, now that Eric is almost 2, I figure it out. Diaperbags are too small for everything you need. I still forget stuff. I have left the house with out a diaper, without a tippie cup, without an extra pair of pants. I have figured out that the overnight Huggies are great for grocery shopping, you know, when he sits in the cart for 90 minutes and has finished off 3 cups of juice (which he's more than met his quota of for half a week). I figured out, and I'm sure I'm not the first, that pizza cutters are super for pancakes. Before the syrup, please. I now know that I have the constant companionship of this little guy until he's 6 + Ellie. She's my bud, us girls have to stick together.
I love being a mom.

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